When we moved to this country we knew we would probably have a baby here at some point. When I found out i was pregnant, i was recommended to see a certain ob/gyn who was familiar with foreign women an had done births for several foreign women i knew. She came with great reviews. She spoke great English which was also great. However, the c-section rate here is over 90% and that had me a little concerned as i did not want to feel pressured into having interventions where they were not needed. I did a ton of research and talked to alot of people about natural birth options here and found very little helpful resources. The ob i was seein was willing to do a natural birth but she could not guarantee me skin to skin time with the baby once he was born. The have pediatritions and nurses that do all the baby care as soon as baby is born and they dont like to interfere with that.
This was important to me. I kept looking for an alternative. Finally at 25 weeks or so, i found a dr online who claimed to be a natural birth dr. I called her up and had a great chat on the phone with her. I was a little nervous about using her as i knew no one else who had used her. I met with her in person a few weeks later with Andrew and she was so great! she answered all my questions and i could tell right away that natural birth was something she really felt strongly about and I would be able to have skin to skin time with baby provided nothing was wrong when he came out. So I switched my care to her. She was always patient and helpul and took time to listen. i never felt rushed.
She had warned me about the pediatritions taking over and said basically as soon as the cord was cut her job was over and the pediatrician would step in so i might have to fight for what i wanted but she woukd let them know my wishes.
I was due June 27 and on June 29th I still had no signs of labour. I had been having intense and painful Braxton Hicks for weeks but no progress. At my last ultrasound on the 27th the Dr. had told me everything looked ready to go and Baby was waiting for my mom to come. My mom came Friday afternoon and Sunday I decided to go to church with everyone to get out of the house and take my mind of impending labour. We had a good morning and I spent the afternoon trying to relax. I had taken an "induction tea" a few days earlier that the Dr. had given me but nothing had happened. I took a bath with lavender essential oil, had supper and then spent the evening on my birthing ball. As we put the kids to bed that night I told E, my 3 year old that if we were not there in the morning we were having the baby. Around 930pm i started having strong Braxton Hicks again...I was getting really annoyed with them. I got ready for bed but I just couldnt relax. Around 10pm I told Andrew I was calling the dr because they were not letting up and although not regular, they felt different enough to ask her about them. (one great thing about living here is all the dr.'s give you their personal cell #s).I gave her a call and she didnt think it was labour yet because it had only been 30 minutes of pain and discomfort, but if I wanted to come in and get checked she would meet me at the hospital and see where things were at.
We got ready to go and by 1030 we were waiting for a taxi. They were still irregular and not all the painful so I was starting to doubt my descsion to go in but I figured we might as well and the taxi was on its way anyways....
We got to the hospital just before 11pm and the dr. met me there. They had me on the monitors and I had only had 1 or 2 contractions since being hooked up but when she checked me she said...welcome to the hospital...your staying. Your at 5 cm.
They got me into the delivery room, turned the lights down and put some soothing music on for me. The nurse (who spoke no english but was great!) got me a hot water bottle for my back and took my info and then both her and the dr left us alone. The dr. made it clear she was sticking close by so if i wanted her I just had to let the nurse know. After 2 hours of now fairly regular contractions but nothing to intense, I asked the nurse to get the dr to check again. With my last birth I was stuck at 4 until they broke my water and I did not want to be going no where if i could progress with my water being broken. The Dr. came back in and checked and I was at 7 so no need to break my water. She left and came back a few minutes later in her scrubs...An hour later I was at 10. By now it was getting intense. I was in lots of pain but I was still getting breaks so it was manageable. The dr. would not offer me any pain reliever as we were wanting to go natural and she didnt like to use drugs anyways...she kept encouraging me to let my body do its thing and push if I wanted but if I didnt feel like pushing not to worry about it and try to relax. At this point I wanted to push but really didnt have the urge. The contractions were very painful and I was getting frustrated that I couldnt push. We tried lots of positions from using the birthing stool to squatting and standing etc. Finally I just stood up for a minute which was not comfortable for me and that seemed to finally bring his head down a bit. I then got on all fours and had my head on a pillow on Andrews lap (he was on a chair) and was hold his hands while i was on my knees. After 2 hours of nothing but painful contractions and being at 10 I finally started feeling his head coming down. I could start pushing for real. I had no idea really what was going on by this point but I do remember feeling the dr behind me grabbing the baby's head to help pull him out...then I knew we were finally close. Where as before she was patient and letting me push on my own she was now strongly encouraging me to push as hard as I could. Finally he was out! 415am just around 6 hours in total. She passed him to me between my legs and I was able to hold him. Then with the help of her, Andrew and the nurse they got me to lay down on the bed so she could deliver the placenta and cut the cord. It was the first time I had really been on the bed. They threw some blankets over me and the baby and then after they had delivered the placenta they let us rest for a half hour or so before transferring me to a clean bed and then wheeling me out of the delivery room to the recovery room.
I found out later that the pediatrician had come into the room while I was pushing waiting to take the baby when he came out but Andrew told me that what she (the dr.) said to the pediatrician translated to, "if you want, you can wait outside the room until later". A nice way of saying we dont need you here. That particular pediatrician never came back. I am thankful for a dr. who understood and advocated for us in what we wanted. Of course once we were in the recovery room, the nurses wanted to take the baby to the nursery so they could weigh him, bathe him, dress him etc. We didn't let them take him for over an hour and when they did finally take him Andrew followed them into all the exam rooms even though they didn't want him too. He told them he was going with the baby whether they liked it or not and the nurses gave in. I think they thought he was a little strange and didn't really like the fact that he just followed them around but they didn't stop him. They did not end up bathing him but they did want to dress him because in this culture they are very paranoid of babies getting cold and therefore getting sick.
Here they keep moms and babies overnight but my OB had given me the green light to go home so if we could get the all clear from the pediatrician we could leave. We had to sign a release for to go home early but we were able to go and we were home in time to see the kids before they went to bed.
Josiah weighed in at 4,175 grams (9lbs 3oz) and was 50 cm long (19.75 inches) The nurses not being as familiar with natural births could not believe we had him naturally as they kept saying that local women dont have babies that big here and most of them have a c-section. One of the nurses even kept asking me why I would ever want to have a natural birth as (in her opinion it was more painful than a c-section) I told her the recovery would be easier and I would rather have a few hours of pain than a few weeks of recovery. She thought I was crazy..haha...
Overall, it was a great experience and went far better than I thought it might and the only difficult part was the intensive language learning experience with the nurses who were telling us things very fast and medical terms. I have no idea what they were saying and I didnt feel like trying, but thankfully Andrew could follow the basic outline. At least it was not our first baby so I didnt feel the need to try and figure out all the details of baby care they were telling us such as how to bathe him & change a diaper etc.
So there you have it! A little long but that is our first experience with giving birth in a cross cultural setting. We still learn funny cultural things whenever we take the baby back for check ups etc but its been good.
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